A Filipino Excursion

Tattoos & Strip Clubs

11/5/25 8:00 PM FILIPINO TIME

After 2 days in Japan, we headed back to the Philippines on the 5th. Our flight boarded at 8:10 am, was roughly 6 hours, and included a 1 hour time change- getting us to Cebu at about 1:40 pm their time. Took us 45 minutes to get our luggage and get through immigration, and about 2.5 hours to make the [normally 30 minute] trip to the hotel, due to the typhoon that hit while we were in Japan.

Our first leg of a 25-hour jaunt back to the states would begin early the next morning. Before
then, we needed to get checked in to the hotel, go buy some clothes, get a tattoo (or 5), and go
back to Theresa’s cousins condo to get all of our luggage.

Good thing my plan for that shitty compilation of flights home- was not to sleep.

Immediately upon arrival to the hotel, I start getting calls from an 800 number. I remember my
bank was trying to contact me the day before about fraudulent charges but I didn’t answer. This
time I did- and mother fucker!!

KLOOK – SHOULD BE BETTER KNOWN AS “CROOK”

I bought three things online while in the Philippines and they all happen to be from this one
website, Klook. I bought an e-sim card for $0.75, the hotel in Tokyo for $301, and the Taxi from NRT airport to our hotel in Tokyo for $45.

Note: I signed up with this app in Philippines. I was viewing the price in USD. The services purchased were in Japan. When I answer my phone, I find out that Crook charged me $0.75, $791, and $102 instead – an
overage of nearly $550.

UPDATE: IT’S DECEMBER 3RD AND I GOT MY MONEY BACK, COURTESY OF VISA. THE F’D UP PART, IS THEY GAVE ME ALL THE MONEY BACK! LOL LIKE I DIDN’T PAY FOR THE HOTEL OR CAB:)

UPDATE 2: SOME TIME IN EARLY APRIL, MY BANK RENEGED AND TOOK THE $700+ BACK OUT OF MY BANK ACCOUNT. I WROTE A CHATGPT LETTER FOR VISA AND COME TO FIND OUT, MY BANK SCREWED UP THE CLAIM SO VISA WOULDNT REVIEW AGAIN. MY BANK ENDED UP CREDITING ME LIKE $350.

So, we left Cebu pretty much when the typhoon was coming in. We could see it from the boat.

When we got back it was fucking horrible. Like Florida all over again, but worse – these fuckers aren’t millionaires nor do they have insurance… or like sturdy houses 😦

I BELIEVE THE DEATH COUNT WAS 212

Side Note: The day following our departure, another typhoon hit, which was even worse.

Anyways, we stayed at Theresa’s cousins’ condo for one night before Japan. No ones actually spent the
night there before, so it was 8,000 degrees, power and water had not been initiated and the mattresses
were in plastic on the floor.

Woooohoo- they in plastic motha-fuckas!!! I’m sleeping good to night lol 😛

We ended up leaving all of our luggage, other than bare necessities, there when we went to Japan. Our
intent, obviously, to fetch it later so we didn’t have to haul around a bunch of shit. PLEASE NOTE THIS GD CONDO IS ON THE 15TH FLOOR.

If you haven’t noticed by now, I tend to enjoy my solitude. At this point, I need it. Theresa is literally – the best travel companion- completely chill! She literally… and I mean LITERALLY, watched our Goddamn plane, move in real time, across the entire fucking Pacific Ocean in the seat screen in front of us. There were probably 140 movies and shows available, but no.

When I mentioned this observation to her, she responded something along the lines of, “I’m Asian, we patient”.

Just in case you don’t fully understand, here is a video of her putting her meal in a to-go box lol….

Anyways… I’m telling you this so you understand it is in no way about her – but, I needed some “me time”. I’m not used to having company for extended periods of time, let alone being babysat… his was the second time I had to have the awkward conversation trying to explain as much. This time was way easier than the first. I explained to her my plan to beat the 25 hours worth of flight home – which was to not sleep. She didn’t seem to surprised.

I don’t remember where I was trying to go, but somehow I ended up at a strip club.

Obviously I’ve never been to a Filipino strip club, and my super aware, overly cautious self was already on high alert- SUMMER, DON’T BE A DUMB-ASS! So, I reached in my purse and gathered a wadded compilation of 3 currencies and asked him to wait for me as I handed it over.

It took me about 5 minutes to decide I wasn’t going anywhere. He didn’t seem very confident
when I told him nicely to kick rocks, but he did.

I started buying shots for the girls and the owner. They were soon teaching me how to twerk
and shit, we had a blast lol.

I vaguely remembering being very confused because I had Theresa’s credit card, but still could not take a cab. In retrospect, the reason is obvious- they don’t take credit cards you dumbass lol.

I closed out the club and these bitches literally took me back to my hotel and walked me up to me room lol. I was as dumbfounded as you in the morning.

THE FUNNIEST [BUT NOT THE MOST SHOCKING] PART OF THIS WHOLE STORY IS THERESA AND I’S CONVERSATION DAYS LATER…

I don’t remember what we were talking about but I kept mentioning “the strippers” who brought
me back to the hotel and she kept correcting me, saying they weren’t strippers. I would continue
the conversation, slyly adding in that they were strippers. I finally asked her why she was so
adamant that they weren’t strippers and she tells me “they were party goers. I have a picture of
you guys”.

After she sends me the picture [I don’t remember taking], I send her back one with the same
girls in their “uniforms”.

LMAO — that’s not even the best part!

A week or so after we get back I go over to my dads so we can figure out what I owe them from
using the card.